Connor, Please Stop Trying To Die On Me

At nine months the fear of SIDS had almost evaporated.  Connor can roll proficiently in both directions, he can crawl and stand.  I didn't really worry about him suffocating in his crib.  I still use breathable bumpers and a breathable blanket just in case, though, because I don't like to take chances...and the Angel Care BeBe Infant Monitor.   It detects the minute movements of his breathing through the crib mattress.  If there has been no movement for 20 seconds, the alarm sounds.

I purchased it after I had to turn back in the respiratory monitor the hospital gave me after those reflux events where he stopped breathing on me

In the 5 months that I have had the monitor the only alarm I have had was when I took Connor out of his crib and forgot to turn it off.  Until this morning.

I was already awake.  I woke up at 5am and my brain didn't want to leave me alone enough so that I could go back to sleep.  I was lying in bed trying to ignore my obnoxious thoughts when I heard a beep.  It was the 15 second warning beep.  I wasn't sure what I was hearing until the full alarm went off.

I leaped out of bed and ran into Connor's room.  I snapped on the light.  He was laying face down as usual.  In a moment I was at his bedside.  I could tell he wasn't breathing.  I picked him up, his body was completely limp.  As I turned him over he took in a deep, gasping breath.  

I discovered his pacifier lodged deep in the folds under his neck.  I had to pry it loose from his skin.  I can only imagine that when he was laying on top of it, the pressure of his body caused it to press against his windpipe, cutting off his air.

I held Connor to me for a long time and just felt him breathing.  I looked down at him to see if he was awake.  His dark, liquid eyes were staring up at me placidly.  When I met his gaze he smiled.

I don't know why Connor had slept so heavily that he didn't wake up when he stopped breathing...maybe it was because he had gotten his 9 month immunizations only hours earlier.  I do believe the Angel Care BeBe Infant Monitor saved my child's life.  I need to write them a thank you letter.